OPINION: 2014 Oscar Wrap-Up

Director Steve McQueen reacts to his Best Picture win. (Photo by AP)

The Academy Awards were last weekend, so – now that everyone is bored with talking about it – here’s yet another take on the ceremony. Perfect timing! As always, there were several highlights, a lot of regrettable decisions and some surprisingly poignant speeches. That last one is the biggest surprise, since it almost never happens.

Ellen DeGeneres was a pleasant, if forgettable, host who decided to forego any roast-style humor. So of course the room loved her. Believe it or not, people with giant egos aren’t big fans of jokes at their expense. (I know – shocking, right?)

Those of us watching at home, however, spent a lot of time looking at our watches as she delivered one cute but time-consuming bit after another. Here are the segments that stood out most to me, for good or ill.

The Good 
The final joke in DeGeneres’ monologue: Most of the host’s jokes were chuckle-worthy at best, but she closed with a genuinely hilarious poke at the Academy. Referring to the evening’s unpredictable categories, she said the night could end in one of two ways: “possibility number one, 12 Years a Slave wins Best Picture. Possibility number two, you’re all racist.” It was a slightly shocking yet welcome reminder of DeGeneres’ stand-up roots.

Pharrell Williams’ “Happy” performance: I’m still glad “Let It Go” won the Oscar for Best Song, but you’re dead inside if “Happy” doesn’t get your toes tapping. In fact, the tune is so infectious that Williams got actresses Lupita Nyong’o, Meryl Streep and Amy Adams to show off some of their best moves. I’m all for anything that allows that self-important room to take itself less seriously for a few minutes.

Bill Murray wins at everything: His joyous reaction to 20 Feet From Stardom star Darlene Love singing part of her acceptance speech? Sublime. When he hijacked the Best Cinematography category to pay quick tribute to the great Harold Ramis? Beautiful. He’d never agree to host the show in a million years, but I’d watch the heck out of it.

Cate Blanchett’s acceptance speech: Best Actress was the biggest lock of the night. Heck, presenter Daniel Day-Lewis probably didn’t even need to open the envelope. But instead of accepting the award as formality, the Blue Jasmine star delivered a passionate speech about Hollywood’s lack of faith in female-driven films. She made a lot of excellent points without sounding bitter or preachy.

In Memoriam, Part One: I still maintain that the “by round of applause, who’s the most famous dead person?” segment is tacky. But I have to admit I was touched that the Academy included two of my favorite authors, Elmore Leonard and Richard Matheson, among the more famous faces.

12 Years a Slave wins Best Picture: I picked Gravity to win the big prize, simply because I cynically assumed that Oscar voters would think of the beautiful yet devastating 12 Years a Slave as homework rather than art. I’m glad I misjudged them; history will look back favorably on their choice.

The Ill

The never-ending montages: Oscar sure does love its clip shows, especially nonsensical ones that seem to exist for no other reason than to eat up time better spent on awards. I rolled my eyes at the first one, but when they showed yet another at 10:50 – when there were still nine categories to go! – I started to lose my patience.

DeGeneres’ ongoing pizza bit: It was a cute idea in theory – poking fun at the length of the show by asking if the attendees wanted to order pizza, then handing it out to everyone when it arrived – but letting it play out in real time was brutal. After midnight rolled around, I realized I could’ve already been in bed if not for the bit. (And, come on, asking the perennially-stoned Harrison Ford if he wanted a slice? What kind of rookie question was that? Of course he did.)

Holding a non-televised ceremony for more interesting recipients: Did you know that Angela Lansbury, Angelina Jolie and Steve Martin won Oscars this year? We didn’t see it, or get to hear their speeches, but who had time for that when there were vague montages about heroes to show? Plus, Ellen had to hand out pizza and take selfies.

John Travolta butchers Idina Menzel’s name: A presenter has one crucial job to do – say someone’s name. But when it was time for Travolta to introduce the Tony winner and her smash hit “Let It Go,” he mangled the singer’s name so bizarrely that it affected her performance. Sure, she’s got a unique name. But it’s pronounced just like it looks and the woman is one of the most famous stage actresses on the planet. Where the heck did “Adele Dazeem” come from?

In Memoriam, Part Two: The simple backdrop of photos and names accompanied by unobtrusive music was a nice touch. But then Bette Midler came out and belted “Wind Beneath My Wings” as the screen split Philip Seymour Hoffman’s face in half. I didn’t know the distinguished actor personally, but everything I’ve read about the man tells me he would’ve downright loathed the schmaltzy segment.